What gives you direction in life?
This implies I have direction in my life and that something either influences it or drives it. I’m not sure either are true. Things happen, I respond to them and my life moves accordingly. In the scheme of things very little of the life I love was ever according to some plan or lofty goal.
I thought I was going to do amazing things in the medical research community but instead I failed out of college. I thought I was going to be married to one person and live a fairytale life. Instead I got divorced and figured out I’m polyamorous and now have multiple partners and live multiple fairytales, not all with happy endings but all with the important life lessons that were the force behind a good fairytale.
I never thought I’d live any where outside the DC metro area if it wasn’t San Diego, but here I am loving life in Florida. That all due to my husband and I have opportunity to experience time down there, not on vacation but life type time with partners. It gave us an understanding that we felt better there.
I never thought I’d get a degree after I failed out but then I discovered the lab and I needed my associates. Ended up with 2, actually. I also never planned to go back for my bachelor’s but selling a house and a manager who kept nudging found me finishing that 7 years after my associates at 40 years old. Never planned to return to school again, ever, like I meant that. Until I was bored and struggling when we first moved to Florida and found out that my job would pay for my master’s 100 percent, no reimbursement just fully covered. How do you pass that up?
I never thought I’d be trying to have a dedicated presence on social media till one day I was like, I’m gonna start making TikToks. And then they were like you can do live streams and I was like that sounds fun. Then TikTok started to feel sketch with all the will it be around or not and my best friend on there left it so I did too and I moved to twitch and YouTube and then I started this site and yeah I don’t know that drove any of that but here we are and I love it.
So what gives me direction? I honestly don’t have a clue but I’m liking where I’m heading so what ever it is working so why bother figuring it out, I’ll just keep doing what I’m doing and life will do what it does.
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I follow all your posts, they are quite good. I would say given what you said about your past you may have received some direction, indirectly from those experiences without realizing it. You had a path it is not in a straight line. It isn’t for any of us.